i am afraid to go, but i am more afraid that i am dying. If i am i don't want to spend my last little bit of time sitting alone in the backyard staring at concrete walls or making life harder than it needs to be for my mom.
the past few weeks i have really been practicing smiling. it keeps people happier, they like me more. except bug. i love her so much for that, for wanting me to be honest.
the glow of the computer highlights the scars if i take off my gloves. my phantom of the opera hand types.
anesthesia on Monday.
just push through the fear, push through the fear.
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